The NUDGER virus

Today I came across a new virus, one that I have called `The NUDGER virus`

From what I can make out it is pretty much harmless, but does deliver a payload that is bound to annoy and wind up the victim. It only effects USB storage devices that are plugged into the system by changing the Volume name to that of the virus name.

Its source is listed below.

## Nudger Virus
## V0.0.2.1
## The NUDGER rules

define USB_INSERTED = 106 ##1101010
define N_label = `NUDGER`

regsiter_hook(USB_INSERTED, DO_NUDGER(USB_Drive_ID))

function DO_NUDGER(USB_Drive_ID)
 if (USB_Drive_ID.volume != N_label)
  USB_Drive_ID.volume = N_label  

It obviously doesn`t do much, except annoy the hell out of people by changing the volume name of the attached USB storage device.


I am saying goodbye to another domain name today,! was the drunken brain child of Smokey and myself while out with the munters in Cambridge one evening. We planned to do lots of things with it, so I spent a few months writing the site and released it to the world and all the fat dads out there.

Money then got tight and I had to stop the hosting, but I kept the front page up as a reminder that it could be back at some stage.

Sadly now that will not be happening as I have no real time to write/develop another website and no real spare money to waste on hosting and domain name renewals 🙁 will always be with me 🙂 and I have enjoyed it while it lasted…….

RIP 23/09/2007 – 23/09/2014


After months of planning and lying about what I was doing, it is finally the wife`s 40th birthday!

I have spent months buying her 40 presents. Me and the kids coming up with ideas of what to get her. Some of the presents are useful, some of them are gimmick or fun things based on 40 years, and some of them, well some of them are for me!

I also spent ages sorting out how to give them to her and planning what would happen through the morning. A bit of teasing with the presents, making her guess what they were, as they were all in one box, she didn`t seem to like that! H read out what each present was about, in the form of some cryptic sentence. Somehow we managed to leave 1 present out of the box

I think that she was pleased with it all, she bloody well better of been as she got what she had been moaning about for months!! 🙂

I got what i wanted for my 40th
I got what i wanted for my 40th

Was also a very rare day, can’t remember the last time it happened, but Smokey, The Gladiator, The Ogre and myself were all together for a chat and a laugh, and boy was it a laugh.

At last all 4 of the lads together
At last all 4 of the lads together

As you can see the 2 sensible ones are on the right. The Gladiator, who we had not seen at his best for a long long time was doing his normal, tyre irons were mentioned, along with Grunda, the Stow and loads more shite, funny shite, funny shite that no one had a clue what it was about!!
There was also the obligatory `he`s gone missing` situation, where more booze was purchased, not sure why that was necessary as there was fuck loads there, but it did make for an interesting time.
Sadly due to family illness Smokey had to leave early, which has left me in a bit of a situation, mainly that there are now well over 30 bottles of cider in the garage that I got for him, it’s going to take me months to drink all that!

Almost a full get together

Today, an event almost happened where the creating force behind my snowey domains were together for the first time in years, our annual Easter Egg hunt for the kids.

Sadly the Ogre was not with us, which was a shame as I had cooked him 12 sausages on the bbq, and knowing how he likes his grub I didn`t want to let him down when he turned up.

There was Smokey, The Gladiator and Me (Snowey) together for a few hours, a few hours to have a catch up, a laugh, a piss take, some food, more of laugh, lots more piss taking, lots more food, even more piss taking, even more laughs and so on…
Highlight has to be when The Gladiator turned up with his sun glasses only to find that they were a pair of 3D glasses from the cinema. Oh how we have missed him!

We even managed to participate in a `Dads` egg and spoon race. Smokey tried to do a sneaky and hide in the toilet, but I wasn’t going to let him get away with that, so with the promise of a bit of bluetak to keep his egg on his spoon we had the race. Surprisingly Smokey won and took away the prize of an Easter Egg. Was gutted as I had my eye on that…

3/4 of the lads

It was a shame that The Ogre wasn`t there, but hopefully he will be coming to the Munters birthday in a few weeks time….

Windows 8 Phone

Today I replaced my trusted Blackberry with a Nokia Windows 8 Phone.
It was a choice between a Windows 8 Phone and an iPhone, but as my network provider does not sell iPhones I opted for the Windows 8 Phone. I got a good deal getting pretty much unlimited Texts, Calls and Data for a few pence more than I was paying for my limited Blackberry tariff.

Form what I have seen around on different network providers I’m paying around half of what it would of cost to get an iPhone!

It’s a great phone with a nice big 4.7 inch screen and it feels nice and solid.

I set up the essential applications, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram but had some very concerning issues with them, mainly that they didn’t update themselves when I got new messages, updates and notifications etc.
I was tearing my hair out, I removed and reinstalled the apps, checked for updates but it stayed the same. It would mean that I would need to manually check the apps for messages etc. every few minutes to make sure that I didn’t miss anything, I’d have to check while walking to work, while at work, while eating lunch, while drinking coffee, while going to the toilet, while fixing computers – but how would I check when I’m driving? I can’t miss any updates while I’m driving??!! What am I going to do?!?!

Oh, but hang on, I’m 42 years old, not 12, and really don’t give a shit if I don’t get any up to the second message notifications. The world won’t end if I don’t respond to some shit app request (all thought it might for the requester).
I have a life and a job and I’m sure I’ll get round to reading notifications when I get a few minutes free…..

I see faces

A conversation with the silver fox today, quiet a strange one, left me thinking that he might need to get his medication looked at.

It started off with him borrowing a wet tile cutter from PBM earlier in the day. He neglected to make sure that there was a blade in the machine to cut the tiles! Not a good start.

Then he set about cutting some tiles to put in to his new walk in bathroom. Upon cutting the first tile he noticed that when it got wet there was a mark resembling a face on the tile?! WTF is he taking the piss?

Not being content with that unusual unique design, he put all the tiles back in his car and took them back to the shop, stating to the customer services rep that he could see faces! The rep must have taken pity on him and seen that something wasn’t right, and said he could change them all. The Silver Fox did say that he didn’t want the tiles in case there were more `faces looking at him`.

I wasted no time at all in informing the Kent connection of the situation, who came up with what I can only describe as a to the point and factual observation of the event
“What a knob head”
I don’t think that either of us had laughed so much, I thought he was going to choke and die!

In all fairness, I think I need to put across The Silver Fox’s point here, if that is at all possible, so I have tried to replicate, to the best of my knowledge and ability, the faces he said he could see in the tiles!? I will update this entry when I have managed to get such detail.

Online Retailer Account Violated

Cant believe I have had to do this 🙁

Recently I violated one of my Online Retailer accounts with a purchase of what I can only describe as an `Old Lady Trolley`. I seem to have been the only mug that was willing to order it on my account and have it delivered to me.

Thankfully it arrived in plain brown wrapping, along with several other items that I had ordered, so no one could see it. Shit, imagine the embarrassment of the postman going –
“Hello Mr Rice, I have an Old Lady Trolley for you, can you sign here”
to which I would of said
“Get the fuck out, I aint ordered that shit. Some one must be playing a prank on me!!!!!”

I quickly hid the bloody thing and said nothing to anyone other than the person that it was intended for, too many people knowing is a situation that I didn`t want to be in.

Just to share my concerns with everyone, this is the offending item


You see what I mean?

Anyway, no more of that shit, next time I order something it will be female clothes, as there is less embarrassment with those!

Job Dodging – the new Workalergic

Today I stumbled upon, or rather was subjected to, a novel way of `Job Dodging`.

In par with `Workalergic` from the good old days (may they Rest In Peace), this was one unique way of getting out of doing any work.

It got me thinking, could I write some code to look at incoming requests and to reject them based on certain criteria? I could call in Project Job Dodging, or to use its highly secretive TLA codeword – PJD!

PJD could check for past issues in relation to the current incoming request and reject if there was found to be a link back.
PJD could check for the instigator of the incoming request against a black list of known previous trouble makers and reject if there was any kind of match.
PJD could check the time the incoming request was received against a complex matrix of maintenance windows and reject the incoming request if a match was found.
PJD could examine the audit trail of the incoming request against a very strict rule and location based criteria and if any deviation from complex predefined rules was found the incoming request would be rejected.
PJD could check the requirements of the incoming request against yet another complex matrix of skill sets and reject it if a mis match was found.

I will go away and ponder on that request, as im sure I could code that quiet easily, I just need to make sure that I get all the correct matrix and lists that are needed. Hmmmmmm

Snowey Blog Import!

Today I set about trying to import my old Snowey blog posts. There were 644 entries dating back to 22/09/2005! Didn`t realise that I has posted so many!

I wrote a quick PHP script to take each table entry and check for certain criteria with in the blog posting. If they were not there then it would import the entry.
The criteria that I was checking for were – inappropriate language, inappropriate content, content that I had deemed no longer relevant and a few other miscellaneous things.

Sadly there were only a few entries that were passed and imported! Given that I don`t really think that it is worth importing those few as they might not be understandable due to prior blog postings not being there for reference!

Will have to see though, as some of the posts I would like to put back up.